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Wednesday, February 24, 2010

i'm sad/happy/angry/fustrated with myself.
Do you ever wonder why you are sad? why aren't you like other people? so fun, friendly? why god made you this way?
i don't know whether is was really a good choice to go to opss. its not that i've regretted it but i'm just thinking.
_ _ _ and - - -( all the short forms) are pissing and hurting me so damn freaking a lot.
why do i have a big mouth?
why am i always overly anxious?
why do i get anxious easily?
why can't i be like tricia or rynell?
why must i be disliked by some peope?
why is my attitude like this?
why am i not doing devotion?
is this really god's plan to make me feel like this?
i really don't know...
today, i totally screwed up the whole 'kindness and english' concert. wtf.
i did not even sing my line at all like just forgot all the words and screwed it up.
the sad thing was that although many teachers said that actually our class was the best, we did not even win the top 3 places.
and mrs buthia was really very sad but she did not show it out. the amount of effort she put in was able to see how much she has done for us. the whole class. and we did not win anything.
Which teacher would spent about 2 hours on sunday just to practice with her students for this competion, come with her husband? she did. she stayed back with us almost every day. and what did we get? nothing. i feel so sorry towards her. like i really owe her and everyone else an apology.
i'm sick... having running nose and sore throat... many even having a fever.
I think i should stop being like this anymore. but i'm really very depress. and i souldn't say what happen in the toilet today but i just hope that God would help me have self-control and stop being so damn irritated with her.

blogged n=by annabel(:

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Photobucket This skin is made by me, _mad@gasca-R♥. Banner's got from The Fading Night. Base codes from Kuearos. Other's are pimp-my-profile and Photobucket.